James Koford/Kofoed/Kofod

My great-aunt, Carrie (Caroline Petrea Koford, b. Aug.1888, Vacaville) was the fourth child of James (Jens) and Caroline Koford.  She was an elementary school teacher and lived with her parents long after she had grown and had a son (Jimmie); she had divorced Jimmie's father soon after marrying him...but that's another story.

Here are a few excerpts from her “autobiography” where she talks about her father. Remember: this is her subjective characterization, and it is written with the eloquence of someone who taught English in elementary school for many years!

Her father’s “most vivid recollection of his birthplace was of the cold, biting winds blowing in from the Baltic Sea to his island home in Svaneka (sic), Bornholm. ...It was not possible for the tiny country of Denmark to support all of her children and it became the accepted course for her stronger sons and daughters to journey across the sea to America…”

“Father came when he was almost eighteen.  His schooling had been what was available in those years until the age of 15.  This was followed by three years of apprenticeship which made him a first class cabinet-maker.”  Carrie relates  that he had a “severe school master” who “inflicted punishment for the slightest infringement of the rules” and therefore “lent nothing to the cultivation of initiative or individuality, keeping these traits in a state of subjection.”

She contrasts this with her mother who had adored her own teacher in Nexø. “Perhaps if Father could have come under the influence of this same teacher he would have had a happier outlook on life, for his was a sensitive soul, and all through his life he was reaching for some beauty, some truth, some satisfaction that he was never quite able to realize. Mother was able to see beauty from every window she gazed through, but father’s thoughts were moody and introspective.”

“During my childhood I thought of him as a stern man, guided by a strict sense of duty.  When he once said he had left his home in Denmark without bidding his mother good-bye, I was unable to understand what I considered his lack of feeling.  It was only after his death that I came to know him…far from being unfeeling, he was deeply emotional, and strove hard to hide that fact.”

…”I know now that frustration was at the root of his unhappiness.  His language handicap was a barrier between him and self-expression, and his occupation did not supply the mental satisfaction that he craved.”

“It would be difficult to explain to a youth of this era, the attitude of Americans toward foreigners …in the [18]80’s and [18]90’s, and even in the early years of this [20^th] century.  All nationalities were tagged with some derogatory title... I once heard my father say sadly, “Fifteen years in this country and we are still considered foreigners.”

In the following anecdote, Carrie wrote why she and her siblings were not taught Danish :

“At first, my parents spoke Danish to each other, but when their first child was old enough to play with the neighbor’s children and spoke a few words in that language, only to be labeled "Dutchy", they discontinued all use of their mother tongue…they bent all their energies toward bringing up their children to be good Americans.”  Her father became a citizen “at the earliest possible moment”, always voting, and “taking a strong interest in current affairs all over the world.  He read during most of his non-working hours."